What are you all up to? Stuck at home, eating, glued to screens? No way, me too! While we’re all here, mourning the loss of our normal lives, why not just really lean into our gluttonous natures? If you’re here for some edible debauchery, I am here to help.
While you’ve been busy baking bread (seriously, so much sourdough) I, on the other hand, have been busy whipping up some sugary, satanic sweets. Ba-Canna Muffins, Weedy Popcorn Treats, and One-Pot Pot Brownies. All of these recipes are super simple to make, and most decently-stocked pantries should have everything you need.
All of these recipes are complete comfort food to help you cope. Nothing exciting. Just plain, good-ass treats to help you get excited about eating weed. Because smoking anything is not a great idea right now.
The first thing I did was make kief butter. Since all of my recipes required some heating of the butter, I didn’t decarboxylate it. All I did was melt some butter, turn off the stove, and mix in the kief. I made the ba-canna muffins right away and saved the rest in a jar for later use.
You can use any concentrate. I used two sticks of butter, which was just enough for basically enough for all the recipes listed.
Notes: You can adapt pretty much any banana bread recipe to make ba-canna muffins. Just use cannabis butter and put them in a muffin pan instead of a bread pan, and adjust the cooking time. Muffins tend to cook faster. They’re better as an edible because a muffin is easier to portion.
- 1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
- 2 teaspoons baking powder
- 1 teaspoon salt
- 3 large bananas, mashed
- 3/4 cup sugar
- 1 egg
- 1/3 cup butter, melted
- Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
- Coat muffin pans with butter, oil, cooking spray or liners. I prefer muffins with no liner.
- Whisk together the flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt.
- Mix bananas, sugar, egg, and melted butter in a large bowl.
- Fold the dry mixture into the wet ingredients, and mix until smooth.
- Spoon into muffin pan.
- Bake for 25 to 30 minutes, the time depends on the pan you use.
Weedy Popcorn Treats
Notes: You can sub out popcorn with any cereal you have at home. It works out to about 14 cups of popcorn, but I wouldn’t use that much cereal. There is a lot of leeway in this recipe, it’s kind of idiot-proof. As long as the popcorn or cereal is coated it’ll stick together, it will just be more or less sweet and have a different texture depending on the ratio.
I also threw in a packet of hot cocoa with mini marshmallows someone left at my house a long time ago in with the mixture because I was a little low on marshmallows and it worked great. That’s why they look a little brownish.
This one was my favorite because it was salty and sweet and I literally used up a bunch of random stuff from my cupboards, including half of a stale bag of marshmallows from camping. Since these aren’t baked, the high was admittedly a little weaker than intended and might be better with decarbed butter. But the melting of the butter and marshmallows activated the THC on some level because they definitely worked.
- 3 tablespoons butter, plus more for the dish
- 1/2 cup popcorn kernels or one 3.5-ounce package plain microwave popcorn
- 1 teaspoon salt
- 1 10-ounce bag marshmallows, if large cut up a bit so they melt easier
- Grease a 9-by-13-inch baking dish, use a smaller dish for thicker bars.
- Pop the popcorn.
- Melt the butter and mix in the marshmallows and salt in a saucepan over medium-low heat, stirring until smooth, 5 to 7 minutes. After it was smooth was when I mixed in the cocoa mix. You could also mix in sprinkles at this time if you’re into that kind of thing.
- Mix in the popcorn until coated.
- Press into pan and let sit for 10 minutes before cutting into pieces.
One-Pot Pot Brownies
- 1/2 cup butter, melted
- 1 tablespoon coconut oil plus more for greasing
- 1 1/8 cup sugar
- 1/2 cup of flour
- 2 eggs
- 2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
- 1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
- Preheat oven to 350°F.
- Lightly grease an 8-inch square baking pan with coconut oil or whatever.
- Melt butter, turn off the pan and remove from burner, mix in oil and sugar. Whisk well for about a minute.
- Add the eggs and vanilla, mix until lighter in color.
- Mix in flour, cocoa powder, and salt. Don’t over mix, it will make the texture cakier and less fudgy.
- Pour batter into prepared pan, smoothing the top out evenly. If you’re adding nuts or chocolate chips, sprinkle them on top at this point.
- Bake until the center of the brownies in the pan is no longer jiggly. Toothpicks won’t come out completely clean with this recipe or they’ll be overbaked. They shouldn’t be covered in liquid, just damp crumbs. Check after 20 minutes, but bake time will vary drastically depending on your oven and pan. I used pyrex and it took at least 30 minutes.
Eat the pain away! And get high doing it. Ba-Canna Muffins, Popcorn Weedy Treats, and One-Pot Pot Brownies will helpfully get you through these hard times.